I guess this isn’t too much of a question but more of a concern. A month ago, I had a client start with me that had previously lost 100 pounds on her own. In 2010-2011, she was in optimum shape and kept it off for 3 years. She since has put on 30 pounds and contacted me to help her stop and lose. The first two weeks, she was dropping pounds and feeling great. She is NO slacker and really puts in some tough sessions with me. I’ve kept in varied, incorporating Boxing, Bosu challenges, weight training, sprinting, etc and I am SO proud of her giving her all. She turns in her dietary logs and is very specific on everything.
Here is where the problem lies. She doesn’t have the greatest support, i.e. her spouse, who she said is morbidly obese, not really wanting to make a change at this time. She tends to sabotage herself once he is eating his meals of choice and falls back into pattern. She is also training for a run on her own of 10 miles happening Oct.4, so she’s been getting some long runs in during her own time, and Yoga. She has a hairdresser that puts her down when seeing her commenting on her weight gain since last time, etc. I REALLY want to help this woman. She did so well on her own and I can see is really hurting and trying to be consistent but is being pulled in different directions. She said she plans to stay with me training, right now she’s been doing 3 days a week and I don’t want to see her regress. I guess I just want to keep it intense for her but don’t know how to keep her from slipping on her own and I am worried for her. She recovered from Back Surgery 3 years ago as well and really is trying.
Sorry so lengthy and no real question, guess I just feel like any input may help.
Perhaps you can suggest that she find others to form a support network?
For example, maybe she could join a running group, or take a series of healthy cooking classes and meet people there. Help her brainstorm how she can plug into a healthier community. Although personally I’d drop the hairdresser like a hot potato, we can’t always subtract people from our lives. Sometimes we need to add strength in ourselves, or add others to our support network.
Perhaps she can eat before her husband eats, so that she’s not tempted. She may not be able to change his habits, and she’s not in charge of his habits. But she doesn’t have to do what he does, so she might have to think creatively around it.
A well-coach that I hired years ago to help me manage my health while doing extreme care-giving for a terminal family member taught me something very important about resilience. He didn’t try to trouble-shoot a single thing for me. He said, “Wow. That must be really hard. How are you going to react to that?” Whenever I dumped an issue, he nudged me to come up with a solution on my own. Perhaps do this for your client – don’t solve things for her. Listen to her, and ask really great questions that will help her find the answers for herself.