Take control of the meals you don’t eat at home too! Most of us have busy lifestyles and don’t eat every meal at the house. If this statement represents you, take action with “on the go” meals & snacks first. Then, when she cooks up her famous soul food, try to take a smaller portion. It’s sometimes the small things that make a difference, and initiate a long-term change.
You can also let her know how you’re feeling. We women tend to internalize negative comments and read too far into things, so make it clear that your decisions about food don’t reflect a change in how you feel about her. Make sure she knows the other ways you need her (laundry, chores, emotional support, etc) by thanking her. Let her know that you want to be around for a long time & feel that a healthier eating plan will do just that. Try to focus on your common ground too by finding a few compromise meals that embody both of your preferences. Transitions like this can be challenging, but definitely not impossible! Good luck & keep us posted.